During all this time, it has been very easy for me to get caught up in what is going on in my life and lose sight of what is happening around me. More so, lose sight of what my problems mean in the larger scheme of things. I’ve said it before and I will say it again, although what is happening to me is something I’ll never wish on anyone, it is so insignificant when compared to the hardship others go. I had a great weekend these past few days. As I wrote on Friday, I was able to spend it with people who I choose to make my family; people who make me feel loved and make me feel at home, regardless of where we are. It was good to get away from everything for a few days, it was relaxing most of all, and I was able to reflect a whole lot, on this situation, and on my life, my wife.
Saturday night we went out to dinner, and it is funny how life will put you in situations, by chance, that will teach you something, open your eyes, put things in perspective. I met this little girl, my aunt’s niece. She is only twelve years old and has already gone through more than I could ever imagine, and probably handle. My aunt had told me her story already, but as I sat there, listening to her, tell her own story, in a matter of seconds, with a smile on her face, I realized that anything that has or could happen to me, just seemed so small. She was adopted at three and came to this country from Eastern Europe, deaf. She didn’t have one of those great gifts, one of those gifts we take for granted every day of our lives, something that is so natural to us, that we never stop and think of all those people who can’t hear, can’t express themselves, can’t see what we see. But with surgeries, therapy and most of all will power, she can now hear, and to be honest, speak pretty damn well. She can understand you perfectly and talk to you, with no issues; although Siri has some trouble understanding her, but then again Siri can't seem to understand me either!
Unless you saw her hearing aids, or knew her story first hand, you would never know that little girl was once unable to hear you. I was really in owe, seeing her so happy, hyper, full of energy. But what hit me the most I think, was listening to her tell her story, her own story of bravery and determination, although she might not know that yet, not only with a smile on her face, but as if it was nothing, as if she could really do it all over again. And I know that we never know what really happens inside a person, I know it first hand, but in children you see an innocence that we lose when we grow up. It is almost a complete honesty, simply because they don’t know anything different, they don’t know how to hide their feelings and emotions, manipulate them. I think I saw a strength in her eyes that I haven’t seen in a lot of people’s, maybe not even in me. Driving back I kept thinking about it, and again, it helped me understand that my issues are so small. I thought, if she can get through something like that, at only twelve years of age, and come out OK, I should be able to make my peace with my issues.
Seeing this little girl so happy with life, so grateful for what she has and what she has overcome, really put a smile on my face and pushed me to be happier, appreciate more, let loose and love life. There have been few instances in the last couple of months that have really helped me see how much I have been missing in life. This was one of them, and just as with the rest of them, I am and will be forever grateful to it. I have never understood the quote, “That which does not kill us, makes us stronger”; but I think I might be getting there. And I don’t necessarily look at it from a physical perspective, but more so from an emotional one. Things like these, a physical disability, a traumatic event, etc… should really take us down, and it does most people. But then you meet someone who came out stronger rather and you once again believe that with strength, determination and perseverance, anything is possible, anything. Never pray for things to be easy, but rather pray for strength to fight hardship. Stand up to the pain, you’ll find out that it is not half as strong as you are. The struggle of life requires us to be strong within ourselves, yet gentle with others; find that balance and always appreciate what you have. Be thankful for your family, your friends, your health, and the love you receive every day. Life is very interesting, as it is sometimes those great pains that will one day become our greatest strengths.
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